It keeps on flowing

When I said that I'm not used to going to the cemetery, I wasn't kidding. I haven't experienced death in the family until my grandfather from the father side passed away last February 2009. On December of the following year, my great grandfather, Amama, joined him. And just last night, my mommy arrived home, sullen faced. Her father, my Lolo Felix Valle, died because of heart attack. My mom just sat down beside me then all of a sudden, her tears came falling down. I didn't know what words to say nor did I know what i can give mom just to appease her so I settled to just staying by her side, listening to her random rambles. LB, as how my brothers and I call Lolo Felix, passed away at a young age. He was even outlived my his mom, my great grandma Inana. Weird enough, LB's death coincided with Inana's 84th birthday.

Death in the family is slowly becoming familiar with me. It's creeping its way into the barrier of youth our family has. I just wish, fervently wish, that none of my grandmas would succumb to the lifetime slumber just yet. I know for sure life would completely be different should this fear of mine happen.

I do not want to leave you guys hanging but I've to beg off from all my blogging duties for the coming 3 days. Please also pray for my mom, she being the eldest child, that she may have the strength to decide on what's best for everyone concerned.

I'm Just So Sad

Dear Friends, earlier this afternoon I rode the LRT station from Vito Cruz to D. Jose then transferred to another LRT line, from Recto to Pureza station where I was usually fetched from. Awhile ago, when I reached Pureza, something caught my attention - the front pocket of my bag was open. And all its contents were gone.

Gone are my:

1. phone (I'm temporarily using my Sun while I try to negotiate with my parents to buy me a similar, if not better, model)

2. favorite powder of all time: (I have it with me everyday, that's how important it is to me)

3. oil control films (Not so important. But still, why did the snatcher get it?)

The good part though was, my wallet was intact since it was in the deep recesses of my books and other paraphernalia. Now I'm sure that I would be more careful with my belongings.

images from google.com

His Last Day

My past entries revolved around the unexpected death of my great grandfather. What other way to end these entries but to post how his wake ended as well. We were all asked to wear white tops, polos particularly. I didn't have any intention to dress up or go against the dress code so I picked the first white polo I laid my hands on. Had I a choice, I would have opted to wear a white dress. I won't story what happened in the last mass offered to him nor will I tell all the teary details of his internment. I think that's too personal ;)

 There were 47 priests who celebrated the Last Mass, including the Bishop

 It was raining that day (Sept 29). It felt like we were in a movie scene, all raining and crying :))

Without this bib necklace, I would have looked plainer than I did in my white polo and pants

Sometimes, Christmas equates sadness

I feel awful. 2010 is nearing to its end and with it comes two of my special Grandpas. I was frequently asked how my family celebrates All Soul's Day but everytime, I would just tell them that it's as if we're celebrating nothing. Until 2009, I never had the chance to visit a cemetery. My grandpas and grandmas in both sides were all just a call away. So really, I didn't have anyone to go to every November. Came February of this year, I experienced the pain of losing someone in the family. My grandpa in my Daddy's side died. I cried, partly because I will never see him again, but mainly I cried because I have never been a good granddaughter to her when he was still alive. To add some more pain, my great grandpa in my Mommy's side passed away earlier this evening. We were throwing a Christmas party for my Tito Roy's employees when mom received a phone call from Quezon province. My great grandpa finally succumb to death. Death has always been something that I can easily say, until now. It feels as if I'm saying an alien word when I say it now. Tomorrow, we'll be going to Quezon to pay our respect to Amama (that's how we called him). The day after that, Christmas Day, I'm not sure if we can still celebrate it as gaily as how we usually do it. 

Wherever you are now, I wish you both are happy.